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November 21, 2003
Bad Joke of the Week
Two more since I forgot last week:
Jim and Bob went duck hunting with Jim's hound dog. "This is the best damn duck hunting dog you'll ever see," Jim said.
The sent the dog over the first hill to scout it out. He came running back, raised his paw once and pointed. They went over the hill and saw one duck. "See, I told you," said Jim.
They sent the dog over the second hill, he came running back, raised his paw twice, and pointed. They went over the hill and saw two ducks. Bob said, "That's amazing."
The third hill Jim said, "I'm going to go with him this time, you wait here." They go over the hill and the dog comes running back. When Jim finally gets back to Bob a minute later, his dog is shot dead.
"What the hell happened? You shot my dog???" Jim yelled.
"I had to," said Bob. "That dog just went crazy. First he humped my leg, then he grabbed a tree branch in his mouth and jumped around, then he humped me again, then grabbed the branch again. He just went nuts, I had to put him down."
"You IDIOT!" Jim screamed. "He was trying to tell you that over that hill there are more fucking ducks than you can shake a stick at!"
And #2:
This guy walks into a bar on the top of a very tall building. He sits down, orders a huge beer, chugs it, walks over to the window, and jumps out. Five minutes later, the guy walks into the bar again, orders another huge beer, chugs it, walks over to the window, and jumps out again. Five minutes later, he re-appears and repeats the whole thing. About half an hour later, another guy at the bar stops the first guy and says, "hey, how the heck are you doing that?!" The first guy responds, "oh, it's really simple physics. When you chug the beer, it makes you all warm inside and since warm air rises, if you just hold your breath you become lighter than air and float down to the sidewalk." "WOW!" exclaims the second man, "I gotta try that!" So he orders a huge beer, chugs it, goes over to the window, jumps out, and splats on the sidewalk below. The bartender looks over to the first man and says, "Superman, you're a jerk when you're drunk."
Posted by ed at November 21, 2003 8:33 AM
Comments
those are ummm....yeah
Posted by: Lewis at November 21, 2003 6:14 PM