I wonder how the most powerful man in the world can repeatedly make an ass of himself.

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When I played with Resist & Exist from 1990-1992, I saw very few bands that really made a gig fun. Like most Crassholes of the time, I was sad when Media Children was done, but I knew Ed, Rick and Sean continuing with a new project had more potential than MC recruiting a new line up. One day, at a party in Santa Ana, I saw Litmus Green open up for us and Minor's Disease. From the first riff, I knew this was something special. John and I were watching. We noticed they were having a great time. You could see they felt liberated, and the music expressed it. Damn, we wished our band was still fun.

I almost went up to Ed and said that I'd volunteer if he ever wanted a second guitarist. Hmmm...

With the few remaining bands that could hold my interest surviving past 1992 (Dogma Mundista and Golpe de Estado broke up) I stopped going to every gig I could get to. Except Litmus Green gigs.

Read on...

I became a dad, moved to a remote mountain community (I hated it) and lost contact with almost everyone. Lysa became my best friend and main contact to the LG world. Once, she let in on a secret. Litmus had considered asking me to play with them. Wow, I was speechless. It wouldn't have been possible with my remote living, but the consideration was quite an honor.

Fast forward a few years....

Ed and I had (almost) too many pints of Guinness at a bar in Whittier. [Can you really have too many pints of Guinness?] He lets me in on a secret. Duh, Ed! I've known that for years. Hehe. A couple of weeks later, he invites me in.

For about a year I've played in Litmus Green. Not only have I been given a chance to play in my favorite band, but I've grown to love these guys like family. And if you know me, then you know that means a lot.

Lewis, the Superfan is quoted as saying "It's okay, I got the greatest gift a fan could ever get....I get to hang out with my favorite band and be their friend." I know how he feels. Except I actually got to join my favorite band and got to create music with them.

Part I

So I walk up to a house and the woman says , "Hey, can you put the packages in my garage?"

"Sure, no problem." Hey, I'm a sweet guy. Damn helpful too.

As I walk past the chain link fence and gate that lead into her backyard, a giant pit bull start jumping like a rally monkey and tries to bite my head off. She laughs and says, "Oh don't worry, he'd just lick you to death."

Hmmm....

The raw meat and shredded cloth (bearing a a remarkable resemblance to the material used in mail carrier shorts) hanging from his mouth led me to believe otherwise.

So Cujo starts bouncing off the fance so hard that the gate pops open. The woman runs and jumps on this beast. She flails and beats it back into the yard (smiling the whole time). "Oh, he's fine, he doesn't bite."

Then she starts baby talking to the hellhound as if it was it were an mewling infant. Meanwhile, her two children (the oldest was maybe 3) are alone in the front, barely clothed in cold weather and throwing fruit into the street.

Part II: The very next stop...

I leave a package on the porch (hmph, no more Mr. Sweet Delivery Boy). Some old bowling ball of a woman rolls out and says "Hey this person doesn't live here." So I walk back, pick up the box and her Toy Shitpile of a mutt comes racing out the front door , runs straight to my feet and bites me. The old bat starts yelling at me "Don't move, don't move!" So I stand still. Guess what? The little ball of furry shit bites me again. She yells, "Goddammit, you people never listen I said stand still." I just started walking away. Standing still didn't seem to work, eh? The dog runs around her car, and the woman from the Cenazoic hobbles like a cripple after it. I walk the other way around and kick the miniature shit ball across the face [Note: and ALF activists have a problem with this??? FUCK YOU!]. I get in the truck, and the Collection of DNA Excrement gets in front of me, barking like, well, an old bitch. I'm thinking,.... one slip of the clutch and I'll turn this fucking mutt into a Toy Puddle!!!

Moral of the Story.....
Dog People suck! What makes someone care for a shitty dog more than anything? You know the type, the ones who lock themselves in a house and know their dog better than any human being. What makes some people so miserable that a animal with almost depth of intelligence becomes that important?

I'm not saying all pet owners are like this. I'm not saying all dogs are a waste a carbon. I'd guess most people are reasonable pet owners. BUT, some people need to be put to sleep.

Tuesday night saw yet another protest by "anarchists" through the streets of Los Angeles. I've been there, done that. I know the reasons why these demos happen, and I understand the feelings involved. I've read the literature, the fanzines, the xeroxed pamhplets spouting cries of class war/police brutality/etc.

Hey, I was raised on Crass too.

But now that I'm older (and hopefully wiser) I see these demos as exercises in futility. I wonder what the aim really is. Sometimes I think people have glamorized tv coverage of poll tax riots in England, general strikes in Germany, and nuke dump resistance in France. I don't think the media has glamorized it, I think these viewers have. Somehow, being oppressed is fashionable. It's as if a group marches to one big ego stroke. Think of it as a group masterbation of the most politically correct kind.

Do I believe police brutality exists? Oh yeah. Sure do.

Do I think something should be done about it? Of course I do.

But somehow, a bunch of kids, dressed in black, pretending they are revolutionaries on par with the EZLN or IRA doesn't strike me as an answer. In fact I think it makes the problem worse. Here's why....

After 9/11 the country (and the world) are more watchful, more paranoid and more angry toward anything claiming to be "revolutionary." Homegrown assholes like Billybob's Militia just make it worse. When the average person sees a march like this they will immediately have a negative reaction. The message isn't heard and the groups involved look worse for being there. Bad P.R. you might say.

If I feel less tolerant watching this on the tube, imagine the typical american.

What is it about the human mind that allows us to forget very important things, but remember useless, trivial crap? I tend to lose my keys three times a day, but I remember facts better left forgotten.

Today I was at work, minding my own business, and along comes a song. It enters my consciousness and won't go away. Now this is very normal. I can't remember a time in my life when a song wasn't playing through my brain. As soon as I awake, the Lare Brain Jukebox is in full swing.

But why would my mind go back to a song I haven't heard in decades? Why would Quiet Riot's rendition of "Cum on Feel the Noize" have to play over and over in my brain? Sure, we joked about playing a QR song at the last gig, but I guess that was enough to send it into instant "repeat track" mode. Fuck!

Bang your head!

hmmm......

Can't we have the last practice EVER without some added drama? I seriously think we should quit being a band and just film practices, gigs, and phone conversations. Mtv would pay big bucks for a show like this. This is like the Real World but we don't gets any royalties.

When I think back to all the bands I've played in, I can't think of one that didn't have stupid shit involved in it. It's always because of someone's issues (ego, substance abuse, fighting over girlfriends, etc.). Why should LG be any different?

I'll tell you why...

Because LG has been around so long with the same people. I've never heard of any other band that had close friends form a group and stay together this long. This is a band that managed to survive all this time while never touring, didn't have any management for a long time (until Ron picked them up), lacked equipment, money, record contracts, and they had to overcome long distances just to rehearse and play gigs. What else can you throw at 4 guys?

Alas, I guess a few things may be stronger than friendships when people let them take over. They destroy creativity and in the end it's NO FUN.

Thank you Ed, Rick, Sean, Mat and Ron. You let me play with my favorite band for the last year. How cool is that?

I want to be a samurai. I want to be able to kick butt with a big ass sword and look good doing it.

I watched Seven Samurai for the hundreth time last night and the movie still ranks in my top 5 of all time (I lump the Star Wars movies into one). I'm not a big movie buff but Kurosawa is a genius and there's no doubt he's my favorite.

Kendo, anyone?

Yet, we managed to score a goal. 4-1 loss to the Renegades is ok since we still rule the penalty box!!! I managed to get 2 shots, woohoo!!!

Somtimes listening to something different is refreshing. Years of blaring Discharge, Conflict, and the like have made anything else seem boring and dull. But what happanes when that intensity gets old?

Lately I've been stuck on a band of complete nerds from Santa Barbara. Nerfherder has to be the dorkiest (sp?) group since the Monkees, but for some reason I find myself listening to it non-stop. Maybe it's the happy Ramones type of beat? Maybe it's the lyrics that would make Chi Pig laugh. Maybe I can relate to their songs?

DOH!!!

Today the Warpigs were "mercied" into submission. The score read 10-0 with 4:06 left in the 3rd. This team kicked our collective ass so bad they must have been loving it. Rumor has it their goalie took a nap throughout most of the second period. The scary thing is, this team (the Chiefs, ironically) finished in last place the previous season. They were 1-9.

My stats for the night:
G: 0
A: 0
+/-: -4
SOG: 0

... and I was one of the better ones. I touched the puck maybe 3 times. Congrats to Mike Urane for getting our ONE shot on goal. Faisal managed to get more penalty minutes than the whole other team combined. Hell that's our new quest... we WILL dominate the penalty box!!!

The good news is I secured a ticket for the Kings season opener tomorrow when "99" gets his jersey retired.

A lot happened this weekend. More than I'll bore you with here. Let's just say that it was a different sort of "night out" for me. Experiencing different scenes/music/events can be an eye opener, especially when you're having fun doing it.

This being my first time in Sin City led me to realize that Vegas is just Disneyland for adults.

And yes, the Kings beat the Avs.

Last night was another practice for the Warpigs, a new team created by a friend of mine. We plan on moving up two divisions at the Anaheim Hockey Club, so we'll probably get our asses kicked. Realistically, we will win only 2 or 3 games out of a 10 games season. We've never played together (except for a couple of people), and the teams we will play against have been together for a long time. Some of my friends have only played a couple of months and this is a huge step for them.

All this has led me to realize that I'm not really into winning. Seriously.

Wins, championships, my +/-, etc. aren't too important to me. Don't get me wrong. I try my best and winning feels nice, but it's not why I play. Our practice was a blast, but our inexperience and lack of training was readily apparent. Rather than be discouraged, I'm looking up to playing with these guys. I'm in it for the fun. It's something I always wanted to do and now (at the venerable age of 30) I'm doing it. It's sort of like playing in a band. From the time I was 8 I wanted to play guitar, do gigs, all that stuff. My first band sucked but it was worth it because it felt good to me.

Skating with Ed, Lewis, and Rick has more value to me than an "official" game where people take themselves too seriously. It's absolutely amazing to me how an Aluminum-level player can be a NHL wanna be.

This division will be a lot more physical and a lot of jock attitudes will be displayed. I'm not looking forward to that part of it. If the frustration outweighs the fun, then I'll have to look elsewhere. Let's face it. Being competitive gets boring real quick. Being the runt of the team lends me to much less "grinder" type role anyway.

The only other consideration I have is how I rate my own effort. If my legs aren't killing me at the final buzzer then I'm not happy. Maybe it's realizing that the only way to get better is through hard work (I can't afford cybernetics...yet). Despite being a lazy sod at times, I haul ass to the best of my ability. It may not be much, but it's all I have. Doing a half ass job just feels shitty. Giving full effort and being a jock are two different things.

I rarely have them. For the first time in ages, I had the crap scared out of me. I remember trying so hard to wake up. I knew it was a dream, but I was so frightenend I couldn't move. The worst part is, if I explained the dream (which felt like hours in length) everyone would laugh. It was the worst made B sci-fi/horror movie ever! Let's just say college, monsters, archeological sites, dinosaurs, scientists, aliens, fire, Buzz Lightyear armor, and Steve Heinze don't lend themselves to a good plot!

No, I'm not kidding.

A while back I gave one reason why consoles suck. There are many. I also admitted that I'd consider buying one to play a few worthy games.

After playing hockey with Ed and Lewis on Sunday, I embraced the darkside. I bought a Playstation2, and a couple of games. You can't talk shit unless you've tried it, right?

Robotech: Battlecry is ok. But I'm still looking for a kickass Macross/Robotech game. This is like Afterburner with transformable mecha. Simplicity is one thing, but please. Gone are the days of Falcon 4.0 and 500 page combat flight sim manuals. If it weren't for the license, I'd never look twice.

I am a huge fan of Medal of Honor: Allied Assualt for the PC, and MOH: Frontline looks like it could be good. The shitty PS2 controller just ruins any first person shooter from the start. I'll take my mouse and keyboard over two tiny analog joysticks anyday. Thanks to info from Lysa, I might try to plug my PC peripherals in. If it doesn't work, Rick may be borrowing the disc sooner than expected.

Hopefully I'll run across some games that'll make this purchase worth it. I figure my disappointment comes from playing on a kick ass computer, playing online with literally thousands of players on one server, and downloading maps, levels, mods, models, bindings, and utilities to keep things from getting stale. OK, maybe I got spoiled by PCs. In the meantime I'll keep my ass in front of my 1600x1200 resolution.

I could have bought a couple of Synergy sticks!!!